Couple Wins Yinzburgh Superbowl, Gets Married in Eat N’ Park.


It’s not everyday that we get to witness Pittsburgh in all of its glory, but Cort Hodil and Janet Blystone made our collective dreams come true when they decided to enter into holy matrimony at Pittsburgh’s culinary embodiment of Shop n’ Save, Eat N’ Park. Outfitted in a plaid shirt, Hodil jaunted through the private dining threshold area, usually reserved for midget football coaching strategies and VFW socials, accompanied by his bride, as they revisited their place of true love, the soup and salad bar.

The couple actually has a pretty Shakespearean existence, both widowers, with Blystone also losing her daughter in a car accident. The two found comfort through each other’s pain, and always went to Eat n’ Park, so…love.

As you look in the background, unsuspecting customers have no idea they’re in the presence of a wedding. I like to imagine what those people are actually doing.

Grandpa Jim (black hat and suspenders) reads the paper. Wonders why they only serve clam chowder on Friday.

Grammy Gladys (golden hair with tight fade) urges her son Ronnie (striped shirt) to take advantage of the BOGO at Payless shoes for his daughter (glitter shirt creeping behind sign), who won’t sit down and eat her chocolate chip pancakes because she’s watching two people get married at Eat N’ Park, because Pittsburgh.